Bronx EMT Discivers Ambulances Are Not Taxis

Years of research led by a Bronx EMT have resulted in a huge discovery in New York, and maybe even all of the US! Juwan Arnold, an EMT in NYC along with a team is seasoned personnel and brilliant scientists have finally come to the conclusion that contrary to popular belief, ambulances are in fact NOT taxis. There has been much speculation and quite a bit of confusion in regards to the large emergency vehicles status as the “Horozontal Taxi”, leading most people to dial 911 for things such as toothaches, rashes, headaches, sore throats, paper cuts, and even nightmares! The public has been led to believe that “Emergency Medical Services” are actually not for emergencies at all, and Arnold’s groundbreaking discovery is about to change the industry in the largest way since the first ambulance hit the streets! “Ambulances appear to be built for medical emergencies, such as suspected heart problems, unconscious patients, patients with debilitating medical conditions, and traumatic injuries…Inividuals who can go to the hospital by cab, should do so, as ambulances do not decrease ER wait times, and can sometimes EXTEND those wait times due to higher priority patients being brought in on other ambulances.” Arnold stated in an exclusive interview with Channel 34 News this morning. This discovery has taken the industry by storm, and may lead to lower response times across the board. This means patients who NEED urgent help, won’t be waiting as long to get it.

Arnold and his team are also conducting studies as to whether cupholders should be required under NYS DOH Part 800, whether Ambulances that start; actually work better for our patients, and whether offering more hours to poverty stricken employees actually solves the problem, vs creating an temporary solution.

You can find Arnold’s results on his website WWW.DEEZNUTSARECOLD.ORG.

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